No Time to Say Goodbye: When a Loved One Dies, Especially a Child
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This book offers solace and practical help to those who have suddenly lost a loved one and all who assist them in their grief. This revised and expanded edition has a new chapter on men, women and grief, discussing some of the different ways people grieve.
Paul Arnott is a Melbourne Anglican minister and the Executive Director of Special Projects, Christian Ministry Advancement (CMA). Paul’s other book Live the Moment (Harper Collins, 2001) seeks to help people discover how to live life as fully as possible.
No Time to Say Goodbye has recently been reviewed by Dorothy Adamek. You can read her review here.
This book was written out of the pain and the grief of the death of our son James on 17 August 1987. I have resisted the temptation to change too much of what I originally wrote, because I doubt that it would be an improvement. When I wrote the opening chapters of the first edition, I did so out of the raw grief of the death of our son. Sixteen years down the track I have a different perspective on things, which comes only with the passing of time. Not that at times it doesn’t hurt almost as much as it did then but the grief is more distant. However, I have included quite a deal of new material on men and women’s grief. I do so in an attempt to clarify a number of misunderstandings about the ways in which men and women grieve and to include new learning about the grieving styles. There is no doubt that the death of a child severely tests the strength of any relationship and it’s no surprise that many relationships break down. I tell the stories fo a number of couples who have had a child die and offer some strategies to help work through the grief caused by such a death. One of the things I have learned in recent years is that there are different styles of grieving and that we need to let people grief in the way that is natural to them.